The Gem Bar and Dining Room: 289 Wellington Street Collingwood

For something completely different, we visited the Gem Bar and Dining Room in Collingwood. This is a grungy, rockabilly, 90s esque Newtown (Sydney) bar that serves American BBQ classics, only with better produce (in my humble opinion).

I ordered the beef brisket because the last time I had brisket in Melbourne (at Meat Mother Richmond) I was so seriously drunk I thought it was the best food ever (I may have annoyingly said that ten times over while I was devouring it). Since I was drunk that is an unreliable memory that needs to be tested (disclaimer: I have never been game to try brisket in America as I am afraid of mass produced grain fed feedlot beef, but I digress).

The Gem served me brisket that well and truly lived up to expectations. It wasn't just tender and juicy, which most places these days can master, it was also rich and smoky and just yum. If all brisket tastes like this, it is amazing (I'm totally getting Senor Gringo a smoker for xmas). Coupled with home made pickles and hand cut fries, we had food gold (although I did skip the okra, that was just a little weird).

My friends had the pork brisket (also similarly smoky with seasoning you wish was one of your family secrets), the cheese burger (suitably with the jack cheese and onion rings) and the smoked eggplant and mushroom veggie burger. All of us were happy except my vegetarian friend, who thought her burger tasted too meaty (she is not one of those vegetarians that would eat mock meat products or anything that reminds her of actual animals - no fakin' bacon here).

I loved this place and not just because it was nostalgic and reminded me of the inner west in Sydney but because the food was great and it had a fantastic vibe. With a place like this around the corner I would probably go out to pubs more. It was a perfect Sunday evening.

Orient East: 348 St Kilda Road South Melbourne

Carrying on from the theme of being transported to another place and time, we come to Orient East. It is an almost kitsch bar that somehow also manages to have a modern day expat vibe to it. I have stumbled across similar places in Vietnam and Singapore and always been overjoyed to find such an oasis.

Fittingly, Orient East serves South East Asian food, with small or large plates and lots of veggies. I got carried away eating and talking so I didn't take many pictures sorry.

We all ordered multiple small veggie dishes to snack on. The dishes were well suited to cocktails and company and weren't too westernised that they lacked spice or that lovely sourness that I like about SE Asian food.

What wasn't vegan could easily be veganised. I did really want to try the lamb ribs or the mandarin duck steamed baos but after hearing my newly vegan friend talk about animal cruelty for 30 minutes before I ordered I just couldn't bring myself to do. Sadly. With some space and time I'm headed back with some meat leaving friends to get my carmel pork on.

This restaurant is definitely a shining star in the wasteland that is St Kilda Road Melbourne (you otherwise don't reach the really good stuff until you get to St Kilda proper).

Two ticks. This is another restaurant that I'd be happy to go back to and show off to my out of town friends.

In order of appearance - the rice crusted smoked tofu with sweet potato crisps, mushrooms and pears (yum, love those enoki mushrooms with pear!) and the french beans with black olive and mustard greens (also perfect). We also had the mee goreng, the vegetarian spring rolls and something else from the specials menu.

The Last Jar: 616 Elizabeth Street Melbourne

Going to the Last Jar is like stepping back in time. Walking through that door I had thoughts of Outlander and the inhabitants of Melbourne 100+ years ago. The venue really took me away from the present as the building is a simplistically beautiful relic of the past, with unadorned walls, hard wood floors and antique fittings.

The food matches the surroundings. The Irish-Gaelic menu requires a bit of google translate action but the unfamiliar titles contribute to the feeling that you are being transported to another era. It helps that they bake the bread, churn the butter, smoke the fish and make the sausages themselves.

A group of eight of us had a Wednesday night dinner at the Last Jar. We covered quite a bit of the menu and nearly all of it was top notch, humble, farm house style food.

According to my fellow diners, the steak was beautiful, very well cooked and able to be enjoyed without sauce or gravy. The fish and chips with mushy peas and home made tartare sauce was exactly what you would want. The pot of mussels with cider, cream, dill and parsley was a lovely soup that managed to be well balanced, not too creamy and quite flavoursome. The whiskey cured salmon, cream cheese and herb salad was disappointing as it was more like a plate of fixings for a sandwich than a salad (it was served with bread) but from the specials menu the croquettes were a standout and a highlight of the meal (apparently - with egg, dairy and seafood a plenty I did not try these dishes).

I ordered the pickled fennel, kale, heirloom tomato and black barley salad (without the yoghurt), along with the battered sausage (how could I not really?). The battered sausage was a little bit of a let down. It didn't taste like anything and on the last bite I noticed it was pink in the middle, which you really don't want from a sausage. The salad however was brilliant. With barley and kale I expected it to be heavy but it was surprisingly light and filling at the same time. I haven't had anything like it before and I would probably fail trying to recreate it at home (can the chef just move in with Senor Gringo and I?). Overall, the Last Jar is a lovely, homely Irish pub, with not a bogan or bar fight in sight ;) Two ticks. Well done folks.

Mesa Verde: Level 6, 252 Swanston Street Melbourne

Mesa Verde has a great relaxed vibe and is a perfect place for groups to meet, particularly given many of the food options work well to share. The restaurant also comes up trumps for their cocktails and imported drinks list.

I went to Mesa Verde with a group of friends. Between us we ordered quesadillas, tacos, scallops, the Mexican charcuterie plate and a couple of the sides. It was difficult to gauge how much to order and the waitress we had wasn’t very helpful in offering guidance. Those who ordered three tacos or a quesadilla plus one other option were content with their portions. The scallops, while apparently very tasty, were not enough to be filling as a main and would require at least a quesadilla or other similar sized option.

I had the large size charcuterie to myself, but without the cheese. It was filling enough for me, even though I wasn’t game to try the terrine looking thing. It reminded me of braun, also known as head cheese. Since I know these things often contain liver I wasn’t willing to go there. My friend finished it off on my behalf and since he kept diving in it couldn’t have been bad…

Mesa Verde would also be a great place just for drinks. It is way better than the rooftop bar upstairs, which feels like a cage.

All in all I’d give it a thumbs up (roughly translated to two ticks). For any group occasions I would recommend it. That being said, we are really spoiled for great Mexican places in the city. Other good ones to try are Touche Hombre and Mamasita, the latter being particularly vegan friendly.

Captain Melville: 34 Franklin Street Melbourne

Fabulous burgers, steak, chips and seemingly random entrees in a beautiful bar with a fabulous outdoor dining space.

Definitely thumbs up for this place. I went with a group of eight friend and not one person was unhappy with their meal. Bonus points, they have a vegan burger and a number of very tasty vegan entrees. I ordered two entrees - miso tofu with seaweed and enoki mushrooms (OMG yum) and a black bean soft taco. If you wanted to order entrees only, I would suggest you order three, as two was not quite enough.

My friends ordered the pork sliders (apparently very good), the vegan burger, with an added egg and therefore no longer vegan (enjoyed by a meat eater and vegetarian alike) and a steak (ordered rare and served evenly pink/red all the way through).

The staff were also really friendly, so overall I would return & recommend it.

Two/three ticks - can't decide ;)

Boney: 68 Little Collins Street Melbourne

Tasty food. Small portions. Too expensive for a weekday lunch, especially since if you order one of the entrees to go with your too small wrap you will be looking at $30 for one person, excluding drinks.

I would say this place would be better for groups, if you are having a drink and a bit of a snack. The food was really nice just not substantial. The drinks menu on the other hand is impressive, with some of my favourite whiskeys and they do have bands most night to add to the atmosphere.

One tick.

Agraba: 63 Errol Street North Melbourne

Having booked to visit this place with a group of friends, I thought I better give it a go first to make sure the $40pp set menu was worth it (it is obligatory for groups of 8 or more). I'm glad I did as the food was really disappointing and I would have been embarrassed to bring my friends here.

The highlight of my meal was the hummus, which was creamy and good. Everything else was bland or just plain bad. The malfouf (spiced minced lamb in cabbage leaves) smelled like feet when they put in on the table and it didn't taste much better either. The lamb skewer from the lunch platter was overcooked, something you will hear me say rarely as I love well done meat. The pickles lacked flavour, I seriously don't know how they managed that, and the falafels did not taste good at all (you would certainly not be willing to die with one of these babies in your hand). Even the char grilled cauliflower was under cooked and flavourless. To top it off, the loubia (green beans in olive oil, coriander and tomato) tasted like nothing. This is one of my favourite Lebanese dishes. If I had of tried it here for the first time I would never have bothered trying it again.

We were the only ones in the restaurant at 2:30pm on a Saturday. I don't know how this place got into the Good Food Guide. Sure, it has a good atmosphere and the drinks are cheap (I can recommend the homemade limonada with a shot of vodka and the Almaza beer) but you go to a restaurant to eat and the food is not even worth finishing. For shame people, for shame. Having grown up with a lot of Lebanese friends I can guarantee you their mums would shake their head or release a tirade about the inadequacy of the place.

Thumbs down, don't do it to yourself.

Jimmy Grants: Melbourne Emporium Lonsdale Street

Jimmy Grants brings you souvlakis from George Calombrais of Master Chef fame. The souvlaki at Melbourne Emporium is way way way above the general quality of a food court venue (although I'm biased on this issue, I'm not a fan of food court 'food'). The meat is slow cooked, well seasoned and tasty. The wrap is finished off in the wood fire, giving it that extra dash of goodness. The only thing is, I want salad instead of chips. Salad adds freshness and balances out meat, making you enjoy it all that much more. But, for $12, it's still a reasonably good deal. Having been to George's restaurant Gazi I can tell you the quality is the same. You are just miss out on the dining experience.

Still... I'd actually prefer the souvaki at King Jon's near Melbourne Central (185 King St Melbourne) or at the Real Greek Souvlaki Bar in Fitzroy (315 Brunswick St Fitzroy).

One tick, done dusted, thank you very much.