The Melbourne Fussy Eater: December 2015

Thursday, 31 December 2015

Wrap up

Well, 2015 was certainly eventful. I tried 53 restaurants in the good food guide and many more besides. The good food guide could surprisingly be hit and miss but sometimes that was because once you removed the egg and dairy the food just did not shine.

Given there are over 480 restaurants and cafes in the two good food guides I own, I didn't make nearly as much progress as I had expected but I'm going to aim for one a week in 2016 and get through as many as possible. Here's to food, fun and friends, have a happy new year.

xoxo
Senor Gringo and the Melbourne Fussy Eater

Sushi Masa: 10 Bourke Street Melbourne

Final blog post for year, I'm going to finish it off telling you about a great little Japanese place in the city.

At Sushi Masa a Japanese man prepares made to order sushi or sashimi for the lunch crowd. The restaurant smells like the ocean and the food is fresh, plentiful and delightful.

My go to favourite is the vegetable bento box with vegetable tempura, agedashi tofu (crispy and well balanced), nasu dengaku (grilled eggplant with miso sauce), miso soup, rice and salad (the potato salad is not fussy eater friendly). Very filling, I haven't managed to eat it all yet but it is worth a try, particularly for $16.50.

Senor Gringo gets the sushi and sashmini combo and I'm game for a little teeny bit of the raw tuna dabbed with wasabi. Their teriyaki beef is also a winner and the lunch menu is about half the price of the dinner menu.

Three ticks. It deserves recognition.

Tina's Noodle Kitchen: 352 High Street Preston

As soon as Tina's Noodle Kitchen opened, it got a write up from the good food folks so I thought I would get ahead of the curve and try it out the weekend it opened.

Even at 3:30pm on a stinking hot Saturday the place was packed. The smells were divine and there was a great ambiance to the place. I just can't say nice things about the food.

Lovely flavours but the pork buns were too doughy (making bread the dominant flavour) and the spicy stewed beef noodle soup had things in it I did not want to see. I don't know what they were - ligaments, tendons, something else? but what ever it was, I wish it wasn't there. I had a little peek in the kitchen on my way back from the bathroom and the other meat looked the same and even though it was slow cooked, the beef chunks I did eat were chewy. Not nice.

I spoke to the Asian diners on the two tables adjacent to me (I'm weird like that) and they loved it but it just wasn't my cup of tea.

One tick. If I could have the broth with noodles and vegetables I would consider returning but it wasn't an option on the menu, especially considering the meat and egg free options were very limited.

Whatever that is, it is meant to be meat - eew

Fob Rolls: Shop 15, Tivoli Arcade, 235-251 Bourke Street Melbourne

Until recently this place served freakin delicious banh mi with the dodgy pork slices replaced by roast duck, pork with crackling and crispy tofu. Their home made sauce was delicious, with the right level of richness and the veggies were plentiful and fresh.

Sadly, the Fob Rolls boys have gone on to bigger and better things (Ho Chi Mama - worth checking out) and the new owners are dumping a tonne of hoisin sauce on the rolls which overpowers the other ingredients (I can't have the home made pate as it has either butter or egg in it so perhaps they thought this would be a suitable substitute??). Plus, the pork and duck are no longer as crispy. Sad. I shed a tear.

I've written to the Fob Roll boys to ask them to help out the new owners. Fingers crossed they will, stranger things have happened, as the rolls were really good.

Rating pending (previously three ticks)

Pics from the old owners - Totally Roasted Roll

M Yong Tofu (formerly The Grand Tofu Flemington): 314 Racecourse Road Flemington

There is nothing grand about this place. I visited just after the restaurant changed hands and sadly it is one of those places that was likely ruined by the new owners.

The food was over processed rubbish. It was not vegan friendly. Nearly all the tofu was stuffed with eggs or fish and the food was just bland. I dumped a whole bunch of chilli oil in my curry soup and tofu dishes and it didn't help. Stay away. Find somewhere else to satisfy your needs - Yong Green Food is great if you're looking for mock meat or tofu options done exceptionally well.

One tick/thumbs down.

Advieh: 71b Gamon Street, Seddon

If you don't live locally, it's okay, Advieh is worth the drive.

Advieh serves yummy Turkish and Moroccan food, including platters, mix and match entree sized portions and a wide variety of salads and wraps, many of which are vegan. Celiacs will also be happy here, as will everybody else with taste buds. Plus, they have genuinely friendly staff and a variety of desserts, some of which are egg and dairy free (though not vegan), yay!

I tend to match the Turkish sausage with three mini salads and a beautifully made coffee or soy chai (with actual spice, not that powder rubbish). Senor Gringo gets something different every time and has never been disappointed. The stand outs for him have been moroccan meatballs with three salads and yoghurt sauce; dukka eggs with pesto, avocado, rocket and sausage; sauteed mushrooms with Bulgarian fetta and poached eggs; and brushetta with fresh tomato and basil.

I'm trying to find some photos I have taken, I know I don't always just drool and tuck in but alas, I must have deleted them. Food pics will be added soon.

This cafe is a stand out that consistently performs well above average with fresh, flavoursome food and coffee. Plus, bonus, if you have a lemon tree you can exchange four lemons for a free coffee - good for everyone.

When it comes to breakfast I'm a bit of a bread addict but I don't need it at Advieh, which is a big call!

Three ticks.

A platter customised for a fussy eater - falafel, home made Turkish sausage, roasted onion and peppers, green bean salad with tomatoes, tabbouleh, two dips, chicken for Senor Gringo and (off to the side) meatballs. Such a great meal and for only $22 we were completely stuffed - bargain.

menu changes regularly

Addis Abeba: 220 Nicholson Street Footscray

Fantastic African restaurant in a town that is dominated by African restaurants.

A word of advice, don't try to order take away over the phone, it never ends well. Just go in, be served by the lovely student who does her homework in between taking orders and enjoy the food. The take away menu is much more limited anyway so you will be missing out if you don't eat in.

The dishes are very filling. Senor Gringo and I order a salad, entree and meat dish of some sort and always walk out stuffed. Our favourites are Special Tibs (cubed lamb with onion, rosemary, garlic, and jalapeno peppers on a hotplate) and the spicy lamb curry (without the butter.

We also highly rate the vegetarian platter (veganised) and the Sega Firfir (spicy lamb stew with tomato, garlic and onion tossed with injera). Plus, sometimes they have live music, which adds to the experience.

Three ticks. We are regulars (sorry about the lack of pictures, my stomach gets the better of me sometimes).

Wednesday, 30 December 2015

1+1 Mandarin Dumpling Restaurant: 84 Hopkins Street Footscray

Not fussy eater friendly.

The pork dumplings have egg in them (why?!), so do the vegetable dumplings though they made me some specially without egg. They were a greasy bland let down. So were the other two dishes we ordered, so much so that it was not even worth remembering what they were.

The restaurant also had a grubby feel, which as I've mentioned I'll ignore if the food is good.

One tick/thumbs down. Don't waste your time or calories.

Sunday, 27 December 2015

8bit: 8 Droop St Footscray

Nothing to see here, move along.

I could eat nothing but the fries. Major disappointment. Major! Especially since so many people rave about this place.

The burger buns have egg, so do most of the sauces, what doesn't have egg has dairy. Senor Gringo told me I wasn't missing out, *cough* OMG this is fantastic, sucks to be you *cough.* I walked away disappointed. The staff were really apologetic about it but I wanted to have a tantrum like a five year old who has just been told they can't have dessert before dinner.

Celiacs are equally excluded. Life is hard. The food world sucks. I may be sulking.

One tick. Don't tell me it's good, I don't want to hear it.

Plough Hotel: 333 Barkly St Footscray

Not much to look at from the outside, this place serves fabulous hearty food that is geared towards carnivores but still offers something for everyone.

I brought a friend here from out of town who loves seafood and red meat, favours pub food that will raise his cholesterol levels but also is a bit of a food snob who doesn't want to slum it with the average working man. Said friend ordered from the specials board - scallops with black pudding (eew), fennel, radish and watercress, followed by a t-bone steak with salad and some sort of baked vegetable and cheese dish. Senor Gringo ravished a steak with creamy mash and I felt very healthy and content having the ancient grain salad with a side of green beans (both veganised).

The food tasted very rich and indulgent but as the portions were not stomach stretching we felt deserving (we like to kid ourselves sometimes).

The drinks menu is equally high quality, well priced and the source of my new favourite whiskey - Laphraoig, a ten year old single malt scotch from the Isle of Islay, $12 a shot here, up to $18 elsewhere.

We all enjoyed our night out and Senor Gringo and I will likely be back for his birthday. Hats off to the owners for a job well done.

Two ticks (although Senor Gringo voted three stars on behalf of all the steak lovers out there)

Bierkeller: 306 Bridge Road Richmond

After great joy, comes great disappointment.

Inspired by Octoberfest, Senor Gringo and I headed to an Austrian restaurant in Richmond for dinner with friends. As you may have guessed by now I love pickles, fermented foods and processed and cured meats (sausages, salami, bacon & the like) and even though I have to be careful to avoid dairy, German and Austrian restaurants can be comfort food heaven.

I ordered the weisswurst with sauerkraut, horseradish, mustard and bread (the other sausages were not fussy eater friendly), Senor Gringo ordered the pork schnitzel with cranberry sauce and a size of fries, accompanied by a stein of dark beer for him and a schnapps for me.

Everything was disappointing. My weisswurst was boiled and flavourless and there wasn't enough mustard and horseradish to improve it (with these accompaniments being similarly dull); Senor Gringo's portions were ample but the food was so lackluster he didn't want to eat it all (does a schnitzel really need to be plate sized?). My schnapps was on the acidic side and not in a pleasant way - it reminded me of stealing the booze my parents had on the side table throughout my teen years (they clearly didn't drink it for a reason). And Senor Gringo's beer wasn't anything he would order again.

Our friends said their food was similarly meh. Good atmosphere but in my humble opinion they have focused on looks and portion size at the expense of taste. Although perhaps I am just not the target audience - those massive parma places attract a certain kind of crowd.

One tick. I suggest they visit the Rhinedorf in Beverly Hills NSW if they ever get the chance - now that places knows good food!

Bangpop: 35 S Wharf Promenade South Whaf

Here is a restaurant that is not getting the attention that it deserves simply because it is in the wrong place - South Wharf. It has food to rival Chin Chin, a great atmosphere and an enviable list of cocktails.

I walked right in on a Saturday night with no booking, was seated promptly and then struggled to choose what I wanted to eat as everything sounded so appetising. I settled on the pad thai with no egg or shrimp and the pork belly croutons with stir fry Chinese broccoli, soy, chilli and garlic. The dishes were huge but we courageously powered through, did a little dance in our seats and blessed the universe for chefs that can cook so well.

Words fail me when I try to explain why but I think the following questions say it all:

How come some people can cook the food that is served at thousands of other places and just do it so much better?
Why aren't more people blessed with this talent?
Is food allowed to taste this amazing?

I recommend you take friends, as many friends as you have, and then insist on ordering for all of you so you can taste lots of dishes. They will thank you at the end of the day, even if they do call you bossy.

Here are some pictures to wet your appetite:

We're back (after being turned away twice, turns out you need to book for standard dining hours).

This time we ordered the beef short ribs with salad as well as the vegan rice crackers with a red chilli and herbs dipping sauce (nam prik ta).

The beef short ribs were AMAZING. They were caramelly and smokey all at once, with a little chilli zing. They were perfectly matched with a cucumber, bean shoot and cashew nut salad that was tangy and citrusy but not too sharp. The rice crackers were also great, my only gripe is that there was not enough sauce. It was so good I wanted more and there was only enough for a little on each cracker. I would order these again to dip in a curry.

We also ordered mocktails. Usually I steer clear from mocktails as I consider them overpriced fruit juice with a distinct lack of booze but these were stunning, with lots of flavour.

Threefold: 381 Flinders Lane Melbourne

Being a Sydney-ite originally, I can't help but think of things in the context of home. Threefold would fit very well into The Rocks or Darlinghurst; they serve food that is a cross between what you would expect at an old school bar or upmarket cafe. Nothing offensive or risque but all very good quality and locally sourced.

The Good Food Guide has this place pegged as a destination for a working lunch, with main meals that have French leanings. There are ample home made cakes, tarts and pastries on display. A few rich and hearty salads (not fussy eater friendly), toasties, sandwiches and home made pies.

I ordered a tomato salami toastie with mustard and even though it came on very white bread (the bane of my life) it was still very good. Senor Gringo ordered a steak sandwich with relish and a side of green beans and salad (coated in butter and therefore off limits to the likes of me).

My meal left me wanting a cider and an afternoon nap, although that is possibly because this is the sort of meal I would have on the odd occasion, in a beer garden somewhere. The price was very reasonable considering the quality (less than $30 for two people) and I would say it would appeal to a wide variety of people, though possibly not the fussiest of eaters (I am not sure celiacs could eat here, nor vegans, though there are vegetarian options).

One tick. Good but not what I really seek in a lunch venue. It would suit my dad or his generation more.

Rice Paper Scissors: Fitzroy and Melbourne CBD

A post about Rose BBQ offers a nice little segway into a discussion about Rice Paper Scissors. This place does offer nouveau cuisine/Asian fusion and it does it very well - tasty, zesty flavours that pay homage to authentic and traditional dishes.

Rice Paper Scissors is my favourite restaurant in Melbourne, not just because I love modern Asian food but because everything is small and you get to try a little of so many things. For a couple, the standard option is five dishes for $55 (27.50 each - bargain). If there are more of you, you all order the same five dishes, they just bring out the number of portions you need. They are flexible and do allow group members to order different options, provided you don't have a group over 12, but don't make it too complicated - be nice to my Rice Paper Scissors peeps, they bring me food gold.

I have tried about half the dishes on the menu and nothing has disappointed me. My must haves are the twice cooked pork belly with tamarind caramel sauce, the steamed pork bun with delectable crispy pork belly, shallots, cucumber and hoisin sauce. Depending on my mood, I then add a veggie dish of some sort, roast duck and one or more of the meat options. I even trust the chefs so much that I'm going to try the lime cured kingfish next time. I need to eat seafood and one of these days my taste buds are going to catch up and learn to love it.

In terms of the flavours, everything is bold but not overpowering. There isn't any misplaced sweetness, just the right mix of tangy, sour and spice. It is fussy eater friendly as nearly everything is gluten free, dairy free and egg free. I don't have to alter a thing but vegans would definitely struggle and perhaps might even need to go elsewhere.

The only downside is you have to wait. They only take bookings for big groups and they allow an hour for each sitting. I have been turned away many times, including once when I arrived two minutes after the bar opened, not even the restaurant - the street was packed and a waiting list was already going. The Fitzroy place is more than double the size of the city venue and you can sometimes get a table with no wait but the staff are not as friendly (a few huffy, puffy, I'm too good for you types).

Now, here is where I rail against the Good Food Guide. Rice Paper Scissors was not in any of the 2015 guides. Any!! I sincerely hope they have rectified this for the 2016 version, otherwise I am going to have to question their taste buds. This restaurant has well and truly earned its three ticks. Come and fight me to get a table and don't get offended if I try to glare at you to hurry the hell up, finish your Asian inspired cocktail and let me at it!